morning coffee at 1:15 PM!!??

Ha! Thats right, for some reason thats well beyond me, my body clock thinks its hillarious to keep me up til after 5 am and leave me sleeping until after noon. I dont enjoy this. When I was young I used to think that when you get old (30) you just get up at 7 every day. Not true. I sleep like Im 17, just 13 years later. Its totally fun that so many of you dear friends have found my blog. Thats precisely why I created it. So ppl I care about and trust can know whats REALLY goin on. Between you and me, all the babies have me a bit jealous, so it would be helpful if all the babies could halt all adorable-ness immediately. Thanks. So, my life in a snapshot: sleep til 12 something. have coffee. sit on here for a couple hours. watch some...Holmes on Homes (best EVER). that pretty much does it. times that by 7 and thats a week. its beyond sad. Ive been discussing this phenomina with my mom (she makes complex things very simple) and she just said NO one can live without a purpose. I have no purpose. I could deflect my purpose onto Melanie, but Ive been there/done that/no thanks. So, Im in a bit of a limbo. I walked away from the institution of "church" 2 years ago. While I dont think its essential for a Christian to "go to church", it does provide ppl with some sense of self. And purpose. So now that its been 2 years and Ive alienated myself from the church I used to attend, Im left with the daunting task of trying to go back and not feel like a square peg in a round hole. Moreso, Im left with the task of trying to make myself go anywhere, just because I know its good for me. Sort of like most things in my life. I find myself craving scripture which Ive NEVER experienced before, and to answer the craving, nothing. Same with reading, I get all stoked to read Chronicles (Im still determined to finish the series) and convince myself to do something else. AHHHHHHH! So Im a bit frustrated with my own nature, and conversly, I guess I also do what I want, even tho I dont think I want it really. Haha....thats not confusing. I always feel the need to post a pic. This one REEKS irony. Taken in Portland, Or. PS-a very freindly hello to teresa and Alison. Holy smokes youre moms!